A mile of smiles

As many of you know, I developed a condition called Bell's Palsy about 33 weeks into this pregnancy. Bell's Palsy affects the seventh cranial nerve, and it typically results in partial or total facial weakness or paralysis on the affected side of the head. No one is really sure what causes it, nor how to treat it, although it's supposedly temporary and benign (apart from being a terrible blow to your psyche). Many of you also know how hard it's been for me to cope with having it. I didn't look that bad, but I couldn't smile or move the left side of my face normally. It's bad enough having to tape my eye shut at night, to prevent it from being dried out, but the worst part for me has been looking serious (or worse, sad) all the time. My dearest wish was to be able to smile at my new son, and I've been unable to do that.

The good news is...After more than 12 weeks, I started to feel a little twitch in the lower jaw on the left side of my face a couple of days ago. Now the left side of my face looks less droopy, too. And if I try hard, I can make a nice little Mona Lisa smile, because I can just barely curl the left side of my mouth upward. It's really small, but it's still a big improvement in my book. I am hoping that it's a good sign that things are starting to improve and heal. I have an appointment with a neurologist on Monday, too.

So I guess William and I are learning how to smile at the same time! He's been giving us flashes of little smiles for a week or two now, but we're never sure if they're just gas or really smiles. I think we've seen some real smiles, in fleeting glimpses, over the last couple of days, though. I am a glutton for them, too. I'd stand on my head (well, if I could) if I thought that it would generate some more smiles. A week or so ago, I was in Toys R Us, and I held up a couple of baby toys to show William. When he smiled at one (or so I thought), I bought it for him. I tell you, this has got to be some sort of very successful evolutionary trait designed to perpetuate the survival of our species: the baby smiles his gummy little toothless grin, the adults go nuts, and the baby gets cuddled and nurtured and held--until he grows up and wrecks the family car.

Here's a preview of what I hope is many more William smiles to come! This is from a Tummy Time session this morning. And when I get my smile back, prepare for an onslaught of photos of me with him, too.