Books We Need

In a committee meeting the other day, I was chatting with some other women who have small children, and we came up with a good idea. Someone should write "A Pregnant Woman's Guide to Nashville."

It would contain a carefully audited list of pediatricians (ahem, I can recommend an excellent one by the way, if anyone's looking), places to buy maternity clothes (the Opry Mills Old Navy), places to fulfill your odd cravings, stores with good restrooms, stores where they sell nursing supplies, and so on. We'd interview all the moms we know and get the best advice and then compile it into one (mostly) definitive guide.

Or perhaps it could become a series, like travel books for various cities. The Lonely Planet Series of Guides to Motherhood. Fill in the name of your own city. Anyone want to sign on with me and create a new venture? Anyone know how to write a business plan?

But I had another idea later. Someone should also write a book that contains all the stuff about parenting that the parenting books always seem to leave out. The not-so-glamorous stuff that happens After you give birth. There are shelves full of books about sleep-training your child but precious little about what kind of nursing pads to buy and why. Or the return of certain bodily functions. Or how to get poop stains out of a christening gown. Or the best way to deal with the mess created by a projectile-vomiting infant. Or why your breast pump is making funny sounds and when it's time to buy new tubing.

Parenting books often deal with, yes, parenting, but let's face it: is adjusting to your new life and all its messes not a cruicial part of being a parent? I know I can find a book about introducing new foods to my child and helping them learn to love a healthy balanced diet. But I want to know how other moms deal with Play-Doh and tiny PlayMobile parts. How do you get puke out of those car seat straps, anyway? What's the best way to get Craisins stains out of the rug? How do you get your two-year-old to smile for the camera? If you hide your child's Halloween candy so they don't get cavities or beg for candy for the rest of their young lives, are you a bad parent or a good parent?

You know, the un-warm-and-fuzzy stuff.